Remembering

Rachel 1999
My sister is due with her first baby this week. It has me thinking back to my first months as a new mother, when everything is uncomfortably, shockingly different and you realize that you barely existed before this moment in time. At once, you are meeting this new little member of the family and acquainting yourself with the new you. It seems almost too much change at once. Not only is there upheaval in day to day life, with endless nights and too short days, but overnight you became an entirely different being….this baby’s mother.
The learning is uphill all the way. It is painful and exhilarating and leaves you breathless all at once. The first teaches you to love, to persevere, to serve. She teaches you more about God’s love than anything else you will ever experience. That fierce, self sacrificing, servant hearted grace-love. It is God’s Spirit working through the flesh.
And the other babies come and they teach you how to be, not only a mother, but a mamma. There is a sweetness in the knowing. You know what love is and what it does. You know how to care and soothe and sustain life. You know who you’ve become.
The becoming is difficult, but it is beautiful. You are beautiful.
Kimberly
I’m linking up to Emily’s blog…looking for the beauty in the everyday. And believe me, mothering is everyday. Sometimes looking back helps you to keep moving forward.

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  • Never thought of it, but you are so right: the first one teaches mothering. The others, you’re the mama. Of course, I had 2 at once, so I guess that made me mama on the first day. or crazy. How about crazy mama? 🙂 Love this post.

  • deb

    This was so well written, and I will add the mother transition to mamma is perfect.
    Thank you for your sweet words, I’m looking forward to reading more of your posts.

  • The becoming is beautiful. You are so right.

  • Abby Hansen

    You are an excellent writer. This is not the first post that has moved me to a few tears 🙂 Funny, 6 months ago I never would have considered it a joy to get out of my comfy bed 1, 2, or 3 times a night to pick up my little peanut. But I am a different (better?) person because of her. Little Rachel, love the pic 🙂